I Promise (A Woman Keepin' It Real With A Man)

Poem shared during Woman II Woman, 12.10.10:

I promise
That if you give me a choice between a burger and a salad
I'll choose the burger

I promise
That I will react to you looking at another woman
With the stereotypical Latina fire

I promise
That I will complain about something at least once a day
Whether it's my weight, or the newest economic policy

I promise
That I will try not to interrupt you during the game
Unless "the game" turns into 4, or 5, or a whole weekend

I promise
That I will gain weight
But I'll try to keep it in all the right places

I promise
That once a month I will REALLY want to throw shoes at you for no reason
Give me chocolate, let it pass, and DON'T tell me it's "just hormones"

I promise
That when you take the garbage out
I'll say that was the best taking out of the garbage I've ever seen

I promise
That when you wear the same sweatpants so much they can stand on their own
I'll quietly put them in the washer for you, and put them right back where you left them (on the floor)

I promise
That, although leaving the toilet seat up is disgusting and selfish
I'll just put it down when I need to, and leave it down, just to make a point (quietly)

I promise
That I'll make your favorite dish
When you're mad at me (but not if I'm mad at you too; there's drive-thrus for that)

I promise
That when times are hard and I have to pay the bills for a few months
I'll still let you be "the man"

I promise
That when even your mother puts you down
I'll lift you up

I promise
That when even your homies doubt you
I'll have your back

I promise
That when you need to hear the truth
I'll say it

I promise
That, when all else fails
My love for you will never fail
My love for you will never die
My love for you will conquer all

I promise.

By Patricia Gonzalez, WLI Advisor

The Movement

In May of 2007, I began my current job as a college counselor and academic advisor. I was excited to work with college students after having spent the previous three years counseling in a high school setting (also known as "changing schedules" and "mounds of paperwork"). Learning a new job, however, is legitimate cause for anxiety. Although I had previous experience with college students, I was eager to do a great job, as this particular job was exactly what I had been wanting to do for years.

Very soon after I started, we hired an intern. My boss gave her the responsibility to start a new program for women, one that would help them learn leadership skills for use in running student organizations or obtaining leadership positions on campus. For some reason, he asked her to work with me. Not only did I have no idea where to start, I did not believe I was qualified to help coordinate a women's leadership program. I did not think of myself as a leader, and I never really liked being around groups of women. Many women have been socialized to believe that we are catty, dramatic, hypersensitive, and competitive. I felt the burden of having to change that belief while continually experiencing it firsthand. I was also learning my way around the college and wanted to be firmly planted in my own job duties before starting a new program. I was very skeptical about taking part in starting this new program, yet something about working with a women's leadership program intrigued me. In the past, I'd had the opportunity to co-facilitate a young women's support circle, and spent time mentoring young women individually both at work and outside of work. I wrote my Master's thesis about middle school girls' perceptions of body image and self-esteem. I was even the advisor of the high school girls' step team where I'd been a counselor. Somehow, I always seemed to find myself working with groups of young women, so although I struggled with the idea of starting this women's leadership program, I was unconsciously drawn to it.

The program became known as the Women's Leadership Institute, or WLI. During the first year, the program was primarily run by our intern, but I attended the sessions, provided planning ideas and support, and assisted in recruiting the first class of participants. We planned development sessions for the ladies, as well as networking opportunities. The idea took off, the college gave us support, and we became an entity. At the end of the intern's contract, it was assumed that I would be taking over the coordination of WLI with a team of women chosen from the Institute's first class. With the previous year's experience as well as my own interest in providing support for the young women, I instituted a support component to WLI, known as Woman II Woman. Since WLI development sessions only took place once a month, the Woman II Woman sessions were meant to bring the young women together more often, but in an informal setting. We talked about relationships, stress, our fathers (or lack thereof), we wrote letters to past or future selves, and we had fun. Anything that we felt was relevant to us as women was a topic for conversation. We truly became a cohesive, supportive sisterhood through Woman II Woman.

WLI is now in its fourth year, and if I had one word to describe it, both as a program and as an experience, that word would be: TRANSFORMING. I've heard young women say that WLI has changed their lives; that it saved them; that if it wasn't for WLI they would not have had a positive social network. I've seen the transformation in so many young women, and I look forward to incorporating the new class of 2011 into our sisterhood. WLI now has over 60 graduates. Each of these young women is making a difference, using her skills and the confidence she has developed to change lives.

We're not perfect; we are in a process. We are moving towards being women of strength, courage, power, and love. What began as a doubt and a struggle has truly propelled me towards my dream. I never knew how passionate I was about empowering young women to love themselves so much that their love would overflow and pour out on all those whom they come into contact with. I've discovered my love, my passion, and my dream. Women's Leadership Institute is not just a program; it's a movement. Move with me. Dream with me.

By Patricia Gonzalez, WLI Advisor

Women’s Leadership Institute Closing Ceremony Keynote Address - 4.30.10

At the close of the year, Women's Leadership Institute has a ceremony to celebrate the accomplishments of its participants throughout the academic year. I am asked to give a keynote address. This year, I thought I would incorporate some of the activities WLI participants experienced during our Woman II Woman sessions. This is an excerpt from the speech given during the WLI Closing Ceremony:

"Good Afternoon Greatness!

Here is your 30 second commercial – Are you feeling insecure, unprepared, alone, and uncomfortable with your place in life? Are you feeling like you’ll never realize your potential? If so, we have the perfect solution for you!

The Women’s Leadership Institute is a program designed to provide emerging woman leaders with the opportunity to gain self-acceptance, learn the importance of reflection and self-evaluation, become emotionally strong, gain empathy, and build relationships while learning leadership skills that last a lifetime. Soon after joining the Women’s Leadership Institute, you will no longer feel insecure, unprepared, alone, and uncomfortable. With the Women’s Leadership Institute, you will find a place that is welcoming, supportive, and dynamic. You will find a place that will help you to grow and accept who you are. But wait, there’s more! The Women’s Leadership Institute will provide you with a new family – a family of sisters, mentors and friends – that will last a lifetime. We are so sure of this that we offer you a lifetime guarantee!

One of our wonderful ladies asked the following question during a Woman II Woman session: 'I love WLI, we are the best women on campus. What makes us so fabulous?' Well, I will tell you – I have a 'What Makes WLI Awesome' list to answer that question:

What Makes WLI Awesome!
• It is a place that helps you learn self-acceptance
• It teaches you not just to talk the talk, but also to walk the talk
• It helps you develop empathy for other women
• It decreases the level of cattiness between women
• It teaches you that knowing yourself is paramount to becoming a leader
• It provides a safe space for growing individually and as a group, disguised as “girl talk”
• It gives you the strength and confidence to stand on your own two feet

In short, Women’s Leadership Institute is beneficial, enriching, inspiring, powerful, and amazing! To answer the question, this is what makes WLI fabulous!

I want to thank all of this year’s participants of WLI for trusting us with your time, energy, and hearts. I want to thank you for these words that I have shared with you, because they all came from YOU.

Last but definitely not least, I want to thank the Program Development team for going above and beyond, for your commitment, for keeping me grounded, for allowing me to be myself with you, and for your dedication and commitment to the Movement that is known as Women’s Leadership Institute.

Thank you!"

Written by Patricia Gonzalez, Women's Leadership Institute Program Advisor
April 2010

Hope for the Future

During the Women’s Leadership Institute’s closing ceremony I suddenly became strongly aware of how significant this organization has been to me this year. Like Kisha and Maya related to during the ceremony, I too was very picky about who I was friends with if they were female because of bad experiences in the past. WLI not only challenged my assumptions of women as catty and competitive but gave me a whole new outlook; women as supportive and strong influences in my life. I can truly say anytime I am around a WLI member (or Ms. G!) my heart warms. They somehow make me feel special, worth something and encourage me to keep fighting the good fight.

Becoming a member of WLI could not have come at a better time. My Mom had been recently told she had several thyroid tumors and they were not sure if they were cancerous or not when I first joined. Seeing my Mom, who has always been a pillar of strength for me, be so afraid literally scared me to my core. If she wasn’t brave how could I be? Thankfully, this is when I started attending WLI Saturday programs, Woman II Woman sessions and started seeing WLI members much more often. Seeing all these young women like myself unashamed to be nervous of all the “unknowns” in their lives because they each believed in their own inner strength to carry them through, gave me the confidence I needed to have faith that my Mom would be okay. On my 21st birthday her results came back and no cancer! This was the best birthday gift I could have ever asked for. I remember sitting down as my Dad told me the good news and immediately praying. I thanked God for all those in my life who helped me through this, and unknowingly all the WLI women who gave me the strength to have faith in myself and most importantly…hope for the future.

Welcome!

Welcome to "Ambrosia Speaks", a blog created specifically for Women's Leadership Institute (WLI) past and current participants to share your stories, memories, letters, "What Makes Me Awesome" lists, and "30 second commercials". Whenever WLI women are given the opportunity to write, the results are eloquent, passionate masterpieces.

The blog is called "Ambrosia Speaks" because, in ancient Greek mythology, Ambrosia is known as the food of the gods. It comes from the word ambrotos, meaning "immortal". Ancient Greek mythology states that ambrosia was brought to the gods by doves, so it is thought of as a divine exhalation of the earth.

In our writing and the sharing of our thoughts, we are like ambrosia, in that our words become immortalized, and are the exhalation of the thoughts and feelings in our souls.

I hope you, the divine women of WLI, use this space to share your internal beauty with the world!

Love ya,
Ms. G